From Primary School to Secondary School: How to Make the Transition Easier

For many children, the move from primary school to secondary school is the biggest change they have experienced so far. A new school, a new system, new people, and at the same time the expectation that they become more independent. As a parent, you want that transition to go as smoothly as possible. But what really helps, and what makes it harder?

Why the transition is sometimes difficult

At primary school, the surroundings are familiar: the same class, the same teacher, the same structure. At secondary school, all that familiarity disappears at once. Children have to deal with several teachers who all have different expectations, a timetable that changes from day to day and a school that is probably much bigger than what they are used to.

The social environment changes too. Friends from groep 8, the last year of primary school, may go to other schools or other classes. Making new friends takes time. All these changes at once can mean your child comes home tired and overstimulated in the first weeks, even if the day went perfectly well objectively speaking.

What helps: structure and fixed anchor points

The best way to ease the transition is to create familiar structure in an unfamiliar environment. This is how you do it:

• A fixed evening routine: every evening at the same time, pack the school bag, check the planner and prepare for tomorrow. That routine gives something to hold on to.
• A fixed study time: even when there is "not much" homework, still sit down at the set time. The habit matters more than the amount of work.
• A weekend moment with a parent: look back on the week together for a moment. What went well? What was hard? That conversation doesn't have to be long, but it helps your child process things and keeps you informed.

The social transition: building friendships takes time

Many children in the Brugklas, the first year of secondary school, feel lonely in the first few weeks, even when surrounded by classmates. That is normal. Real friendships at secondary school are different from those at primary school: they grow more slowly and are based on shared interests rather than shared school years.

Encourage your child to join a club, sports association or another activity outside school. Contacts made through a shared interest are often more lasting than contacts that only exist at school.

When should you step in?

A bit of difficulty at the start is completely normal. But there are signs that call for action: your child really doesn't want to go to school any more, cries regularly in the evening, keeps missing homework or complains of sleep problems. In that case, a talk with the mentor (the teacher who looks after the class) is the first step. Most mentors at secondary schools are well equipped to support children in the Brugklas with this kind of adjustment problem.

Don't forget, either, that a good study approach makes an enormous difference early on. Children who know how to organise their time and plan their homework feel competent sooner. And that feeling of competence is the best antidote to school stress.

Also read: How do you prepare your child for secondary school? and Getting back into a school rhythm after the summer holidays